100 Broken Windows says: (04:04:50)
hi half caste mang
Citizen Erased || I don't wanna be a spirit in your material world. says: (04:05:07)
mang
100 Broken Windows says: (04:05:35)
stop doing the lol@ thing
100 Broken Windows says: (04:05:41)
it makes you look even stupider than you are
Citizen Erased || I don't wanna be a spirit in your material world. says: (04:05:42)
kk
100 Broken Windows says: (04:06:00)
you're like a dumb dog with a new trick
100 Broken Windows says: (04:06:07)
and i wanna kick your faggot face in
Citizen Erased || I don't wanna be a spirit in your material world. says: (04:06:10)
you're like a dumb dog with an old trick
100 Broken Windows says: (04:06:16)
oh, wow
100 Broken Windows says: (04:06:18)
stunned.
30 November 2006
14 November 2006
14 october 2006
i'm drinking coffee and vodka after a sleepless night.
up since 9 PM and it's 1 PM. i'm ODing on vodka and coffee lol. But now I'm trying to sleep. see how well that's working? Talked with Irina from about 7:30 till 10. God. Apparently she's had a black stalker. half-black? doesn't matter I guess. I'm just obscenely in love with this girl. she's worth all the waiting. I don't even feel the need to get laid at this point. remarkable for a boy, no?
Ok I can trick myself as much as I want, Whatever. I suppose I need to get mum a melón and some more lemons. naranjas as well, since i'm always making zumo naranja. fun.
"Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees, then names the streets after them."
Had a stimulating discussion with mum about Radiohead. Few conversations stand out like this. She's listening to The Eraser. I want her to continue through HTDC and Analyse. Beautiful songs. Amazing. I almost cried to How to disappear. I don't want to disappear. I want to be a whole. I will be. With Irina. I hope. I have to. That's all.
up since 9 PM and it's 1 PM. i'm ODing on vodka and coffee lol. But now I'm trying to sleep. see how well that's working? Talked with Irina from about 7:30 till 10. God. Apparently she's had a black stalker. half-black? doesn't matter I guess. I'm just obscenely in love with this girl. she's worth all the waiting. I don't even feel the need to get laid at this point. remarkable for a boy, no?
Ok I can trick myself as much as I want, Whatever. I suppose I need to get mum a melón and some more lemons. naranjas as well, since i'm always making zumo naranja. fun.
"Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees, then names the streets after them."
Had a stimulating discussion with mum about Radiohead. Few conversations stand out like this. She's listening to The Eraser. I want her to continue through HTDC and Analyse. Beautiful songs. Amazing. I almost cried to How to disappear. I don't want to disappear. I want to be a whole. I will be. With Irina. I hope. I have to. That's all.
13 october 2006
- green peppers
- lentils
- tomatoes
- mineral water
- mushrooms
- tinto crianza
- lemons
- melon
today is friday the 13th. acknowledge this.
12 october 2006
it's about 24 hours since I last talked to irina. I desperately miss her. and love her. she left me an e-mail since I didn't turn up online. I'll email her back as soon as I'm in the right place.
or I'll go to the internet cafe close to here. mom, she feels like she can just seek affirmation at any point from me. I can't be the one to do that obviously, she has to do it for herself.
but she'll never understand.
I had a dream last night. I was out with Ira and some friends. when we got to a house and were finally in private i tried to kiss her, but she didn't want to.
I feel as if I can't get to her. there is something in the way.
i know she wanted to talk to me last night but despite at one point waking up at a quarter to 6 AM (12AM her time) I still couldn't do it. I can't face up to it.
I feel broken. she loves me. she makes me feel wonderful, but alone i am desperately alone.
cymbal rush is so beautiful.
we went all the way down to the port vell, at the end of las ramblas and via laietana. the post office (correos) was closed today. we'll have to go at another point, maybe with postcards and emily's magazine.
that'd be a good idea.
there is a twinge of annoyance associated with the fact I'm not with the love of my life (lolzerz) but on the whole, I feel terribly lucky that we both love each other so much. it's a good feeling.
my headache isn't.
ugh. i'm tired. and sometimes i just want not to hear anything. at. all.
or I'll go to the internet cafe close to here. mom, she feels like she can just seek affirmation at any point from me. I can't be the one to do that obviously, she has to do it for herself.
but she'll never understand.
I had a dream last night. I was out with Ira and some friends. when we got to a house and were finally in private i tried to kiss her, but she didn't want to.
I feel as if I can't get to her. there is something in the way.
i know she wanted to talk to me last night but despite at one point waking up at a quarter to 6 AM (12AM her time) I still couldn't do it. I can't face up to it.
I feel broken. she loves me. she makes me feel wonderful, but alone i am desperately alone.
cymbal rush is so beautiful.
we went all the way down to the port vell, at the end of las ramblas and via laietana. the post office (correos) was closed today. we'll have to go at another point, maybe with postcards and emily's magazine.
that'd be a good idea.
there is a twinge of annoyance associated with the fact I'm not with the love of my life (lolzerz) but on the whole, I feel terribly lucky that we both love each other so much. it's a good feeling.
my headache isn't.
ugh. i'm tired. and sometimes i just want not to hear anything. at. all.
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